December 12, 2012. Its been years since i posted, but i decided to start this up again. Ben is 6-i think he was maybe 2 or 3 when I last wrote...a life time ago. And of course now we have Liam! Who, light of every one's life, will be 2 in March.
So it's Christmas and the hardest thing about making Christmas happen for Ben in the way that I want to is that he keeps changing his mind. So yesterday it was Bioncles, today it's GI Joe and tomorrow today's likes may become passe...he also heard at school there's no Santa so last night as we colored-me a Christmas tree, him a fart shooting tank (hahaaahaa...) he wanted me to level with him. I said, "Well, I think the spirit of giving that just about everybody has this time of year must come from somewhere. I think that "somewhere" is the spirit of Santa who was a man a very long time ago who was so generous he gave gifts to everyone." He was satisfied with that then told me some of the cool things he wants. We brainstormed what others might want from him. Meanwhile he worked very hard on a fart cloud...
During this time of year, which I love by the way, I confront face to face a belief I have not in my 37 years been able to debunk: life's better when you have money. There are many parts of my brain that reject this notion: I mean the counterargument is shown by countless saints, Great Gatsby wasn't really happy in all the decadence, blah blah blah-I know this idea money=happiness should be repelled like early nineties z cavariccis, and yet as I sit here in my old pilly sweater and shotty boots that literally need to be glued and scan countless pages of gorgeous rooms that some part of my brain thinks my boys would live better lives in...i feel like a captive spawn of capitalism. If only I could give more, have more...somehow I would be more. I can't seem to will myself out of this line of thinking. As I drive home from work to see my kiddos, a 6 foot banner catches my attention. It hangs on the outside of a jewellery store and says "Santa, I promise to be good!" It kinda makes me throw up in my mouth a little bit...and yet as I stand in criticism of it I simultaneously reach under my seat for the coupon book.
So what can you do when you can't chase away the scary voice? I guess it's enough, today, to identify it as a "scary voice". Yeah there will be no "transcending" happening today as I salivate over Target's buy one toy get the other 50%...I will not be "reaching communion with my larger, inner self" as I drool over the cashmere cardigan I was foolish enough to try on then disparately want. However upon reflection-there is this hope and consolation: the mellow hum after all those pressies are unwrapped isn't emanating from the waft of Neiman Marcus or Nordstrom-it's coming from the warmth of all the love that went behind all that shopping. Some where in my brain is the immutable knowledge that I have a wealth of love for the people in my life and that is the true spirit of Christmas (even though that robe would be awfully nice to have...). For today it's enough.
Wednesday, December 12, 2012
Monday, January 5, 2009
Back to work
We made it through the first day back. I made it a point to not do much running around for vacation since life is so busy...and was mostly successful. Highlights: seeing family and friends, LOTS of cuddlin with Ben, a trip to NYC with the Kellers, sleep sleep and more sleep, having Alex and Ben there all day in our cozy house, playing with Syl and shoppin with Lee and Kate. Mostly, I enjoyed not rushing around.
All the hibernating put Ben in a bit of a tv rut so a couple days ago I took him to a indoor kid gym, kid juction, with Syl. They loved it and we loved watching them have such a nice time. Ben dressed up in a red superhero get up and felt so cool speeding down slides and climbing roped bridges. Then we had a birthday celebration for Kacey at her place. What a fun day!
We recovered on Sunday and made it back today. Ben did just great and I could tell he had a fun day-he wouldn't stop singing the whole way home. This is despite the fact that he said last night: "no school. i sick. i stay home." Where does he get these things!?
All the hibernating put Ben in a bit of a tv rut so a couple days ago I took him to a indoor kid gym, kid juction, with Syl. They loved it and we loved watching them have such a nice time. Ben dressed up in a red superhero get up and felt so cool speeding down slides and climbing roped bridges. Then we had a birthday celebration for Kacey at her place. What a fun day!
We recovered on Sunday and made it back today. Ben did just great and I could tell he had a fun day-he wouldn't stop singing the whole way home. This is despite the fact that he said last night: "no school. i sick. i stay home." Where does he get these things!?
Saturday, December 27, 2008
A Great Christmas Afterall
We had our doubts about whether Christmas would be enjoyable this year because on Christmas Eve, Boo came down with a nasty stomach virus. After several hours of no warning, projectile vomiting, Ben had a long rest and woke up mostly okay on Christmas morning. He didn't tear into the presents, as I thought he would, but enjoyed each one nevertheless (which made my desperate day before Christmas Eve shopping spree feel worth all the effort). He especially liked the Thomas lego train. After opening this one, he had to be persuaded to stop playing to open the rest.
After stomach fluids stabilized, we had pancakes and then headed over to the Youngs' house for a lovely Christmas dinner. My sister and her family are staying with her in laws because there was a fire in her kitchen several days before Christmas (what a year it's been!). Thankfully, there is limited permanent damage, but lots of smoke damage-everything is coated in a thin layer of soot. So, all cramped in a tiny living room, practically sitting on top of one another, but somehow not really minding, we opened presents.
Meanwhile I followed Ben around with a plastic bag in case he got sick because cleaning puke off Lorette's white couch might actually ruin my Christmas. He managed to stay well, although he wanted no part of dinner and has just been picking at food ever since. His adorable fancy Christmas outfit with the green sweater vest stayed clean. We enjoyed playing Wii, playing with the Hess trucks, rocket and haunted castle car toy Ben got. Adam had gotten Ben an incredible truck full of cars...which he hasn't stopped toting around since. The girls made makeup with the Barbie kit, showed off their Uggs and designer duds. It was a great Christmas. I have so much to appreciate and be thankful for...
This morning Ben says, ma, who we seeing today? Sylvie?Meghan Gramma Nobody? Just us buddy, just us.
After stomach fluids stabilized, we had pancakes and then headed over to the Youngs' house for a lovely Christmas dinner. My sister and her family are staying with her in laws because there was a fire in her kitchen several days before Christmas (what a year it's been!). Thankfully, there is limited permanent damage, but lots of smoke damage-everything is coated in a thin layer of soot. So, all cramped in a tiny living room, practically sitting on top of one another, but somehow not really minding, we opened presents.
Meanwhile I followed Ben around with a plastic bag in case he got sick because cleaning puke off Lorette's white couch might actually ruin my Christmas. He managed to stay well, although he wanted no part of dinner and has just been picking at food ever since. His adorable fancy Christmas outfit with the green sweater vest stayed clean. We enjoyed playing Wii, playing with the Hess trucks, rocket and haunted castle car toy Ben got. Adam had gotten Ben an incredible truck full of cars...which he hasn't stopped toting around since. The girls made makeup with the Barbie kit, showed off their Uggs and designer duds. It was a great Christmas. I have so much to appreciate and be thankful for...
This morning Ben says, ma, who we seeing today? Sylvie?
Friday, December 19, 2008
Snow day!
Once in a while, the sky opens up and from the depths of the expansive galaxy, a great blessing falls from the heavens into the mundanity of one's life. That's right: a snow day when you are a teacher. It is a treasured thing and today I plan to revel in it!
Ben snores away on top of Al right now. He is fond of laying on him while sleeping. Papa Bear and Little Cub all nestled up. We might go to Pfizer's family day at Alex's work today since the snow near us isn't bad. Santa will be there and Ben is growing increasingly curious of the old man. Might be fun...but worth the drive...we'll see.
Yesterday he killed me with saying for the first time, "Are you serious?!" with the most sarcastic expression on his face and if I recall, hands on his hips. Well, since I laughed so hard, that's all he says, to the cat, to the Bear...is anybody, anywhere serious? And boy is he bossy. Two days ago Alex tickled me and as I squealed Ben said, "that's not nice! go sit on the green chair, daddy!" which Al did. He was merciful and after a couple of minutes Alex was allowed to get up. But first Ben said, "go give mommy a kiss and say sorry." We are so sunk...not even 3 yet!!!
We were gonna kick off potty training over winter break which is NEXT FRIGGEN WEEK (are you getting the excitement there?) We're doing pull ups at first cause with all the defiance, I am expecting it to be a slow go. He says he wants to go potty before bath time but throughout the day when he wants to be doing other stuff is another story. We'll wing it and follow his lead. No pressure on him and see where it goes...
Ben snores away on top of Al right now. He is fond of laying on him while sleeping. Papa Bear and Little Cub all nestled up. We might go to Pfizer's family day at Alex's work today since the snow near us isn't bad. Santa will be there and Ben is growing increasingly curious of the old man. Might be fun...but worth the drive...we'll see.
Yesterday he killed me with saying for the first time, "Are you serious?!" with the most sarcastic expression on his face and if I recall, hands on his hips. Well, since I laughed so hard, that's all he says, to the cat, to the Bear...is anybody, anywhere serious? And boy is he bossy. Two days ago Alex tickled me and as I squealed Ben said, "that's not nice! go sit on the green chair, daddy!" which Al did. He was merciful and after a couple of minutes Alex was allowed to get up. But first Ben said, "go give mommy a kiss and say sorry." We are so sunk...not even 3 yet!!!
We were gonna kick off potty training over winter break which is NEXT FRIGGEN WEEK (are you getting the excitement there?) We're doing pull ups at first cause with all the defiance, I am expecting it to be a slow go. He says he wants to go potty before bath time but throughout the day when he wants to be doing other stuff is another story. We'll wing it and follow his lead. No pressure on him and see where it goes...
Monday, December 15, 2008
Dinner with Syl
Ben and Sylvie had a special pre xmas dinner at the diner this weekend Before we met up, Kacey chatted with Ben on the cell. Of course the chat led to a discussion about Santa , the old man we keep bringing up lately. Kacey asks Ben what he wants Santa to bring him. Without missing a beat, Ben says, "I want batteries." For all the broken toys he has that aren't working....it was hilarious. So ghetto. Kacey took a while to recover.
After a rousing dinner with tinkerbell (Sylvie arrived in costume) we went shopping and bought designer training underwear for tinkerbell...the men wrangled the toddlers as we did a quick spin.
Sunday was a grading marathon for me- 9-10 hours of grading papers while Ben hung with the grands and katie meg lee until way after bed time. Apparently he saw Santa on a firetruck so today he was wondering why Santa wasn't on the ambulance that whizzed down 78. The kid thinks...On 2 hours of sleep I somehow got us home alive. We are beyond tired...and so happy to be home. 6 days left till break!!!
After a rousing dinner with tinkerbell (Sylvie arrived in costume) we went shopping and bought designer training underwear for tinkerbell...the men wrangled the toddlers as we did a quick spin.
Sunday was a grading marathon for me- 9-10 hours of grading papers while Ben hung with the grands and katie meg lee until way after bed time. Apparently he saw Santa on a firetruck so today he was wondering why Santa wasn't on the ambulance that whizzed down 78. The kid thinks...On 2 hours of sleep I somehow got us home alive. We are beyond tired...and so happy to be home. 6 days left till break!!!
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
The conference
Today I met with Ben's teachers to discuss how things are going. What a nice, long chat we had! Ben is described as a very polite, social addition to the classroom. He apparently is obsessed with reminding everyone to push in their chairs and remembering to say please and thank you. He sits nicely in circle and enjoys hearing stories and books. Sometimes this well mattered behavior doesn't carry over into asking friends to leave his work alone, though-he sometimes pushes instead of using his words. Or he shouts "walk away!" to someone a bit too close to his work.
Another insight was that he is rather reluctant to show his teacher his lessons. She will ask him to show her how to do a particular work and he won't, he's not too interested in lessons...At first they wondered if he could do the lesson, but on his own he completes the very same lessons start to finish with no problem. It's curious...I wonder if maybe he feels on the spot during the lessons. I see this at home, too. For example, we read the Dora the Explorer book and there's all kinds of questions about what Dora needs next in her journey to wherever...he identified the scissors for cutting the net correctly the first three times we read the story, but now he says she needs the life jackets for every question. He knows Dora does not need the life jacket to cut through the net to get over the troll bridge, but he shouts "life jackets, life jackets!!" when I ask him now. I think it's because he likes the life jackets. Ohh Ben...
According to the teachers, on most things, he is in the practicing mode rather than in the mastery mode. He has mastered sorting, but he can't identify red, blue, yellow on his own. He can count to 11 outloud but doesn't actually identify any number but 1 consistently. This apparently is age appropriate. I wonder if he is able to do more than he shows since he is so reluctant to show off his talents to his teacher during lessons. He can hold a pencil the appropriate way, he loves art work, and he has wonderful friendships in the class.
Sometimes, the teachers have to remind him to stay on task, but then at times he will sit for long periods of time concentrating...especially while stringing beads or doing a very tough shape puzzle. He could spend the whole day in the practical life section pouring, spooning, or at the easel painting.
Overall, I was left with the feeling that Ben is loved and taken care of at his school. They really like him, which I needed to know after I heard he had some trouble pushing and hitting. I feel so much more connected to them and comfortable about having him there all day. It was a great day!
Another insight was that he is rather reluctant to show his teacher his lessons. She will ask him to show her how to do a particular work and he won't, he's not too interested in lessons...At first they wondered if he could do the lesson, but on his own he completes the very same lessons start to finish with no problem. It's curious...I wonder if maybe he feels on the spot during the lessons. I see this at home, too. For example, we read the Dora the Explorer book and there's all kinds of questions about what Dora needs next in her journey to wherever...he identified the scissors for cutting the net correctly the first three times we read the story, but now he says she needs the life jackets for every question. He knows Dora does not need the life jacket to cut through the net to get over the troll bridge, but he shouts "life jackets, life jackets!!" when I ask him now. I think it's because he likes the life jackets. Ohh Ben...
According to the teachers, on most things, he is in the practicing mode rather than in the mastery mode. He has mastered sorting, but he can't identify red, blue, yellow on his own. He can count to 11 outloud but doesn't actually identify any number but 1 consistently. This apparently is age appropriate. I wonder if he is able to do more than he shows since he is so reluctant to show off his talents to his teacher during lessons. He can hold a pencil the appropriate way, he loves art work, and he has wonderful friendships in the class.
Sometimes, the teachers have to remind him to stay on task, but then at times he will sit for long periods of time concentrating...especially while stringing beads or doing a very tough shape puzzle. He could spend the whole day in the practical life section pouring, spooning, or at the easel painting.
Overall, I was left with the feeling that Ben is loved and taken care of at his school. They really like him, which I needed to know after I heard he had some trouble pushing and hitting. I feel so much more connected to them and comfortable about having him there all day. It was a great day!
Monday, December 1, 2008
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